Real Talk: The Reality of Life Postpartum

I hope you guys have been enjoying my Real Talk series here on TameraMowry.com. I personally love getting a chance to talk directly about real life struggles and triumphs, inspiration and truths, and hearing your stories in return. Today’s topic is postpartum life, something that I’ve touched on before. The thing is, life after pregnancy is different in so many ways, and we all have unique experiences. But the digital world often makes it seem like what we go through is all the same, and honestly, that it’s a lot more glamorous than it sometimes is! I think we can all relate.

Tamera Mowry Aden

Throwback! My first time around…

As much as I hope to be an inspiration for all mommies on their journeys to getting that pre-pregnancy body back and knowing that you can achieve all your health and fitness goals, I also want to set a realistic example. The truth is that the length and pace of the journey is different for everyone. Nothing happens overnight. For some women, a major struggle post-pregnancy is dropping the weight. For others, there are mental struggles like depression (there are 3 million US cases of postpartum depression each year – and even more undiagnosed) and feelings of isolation or stress. Usually, there are both the mental and physical ups and downs to navigate.

And while it’s important to focus on keeping physically fit and healthy so that we can better meet the needs of our little ones, let’s face it – there are always going to be a million other things to focus on at the same time. Life can throw things at you that deserve more focus than arbitrary weight goals (don’t get me wrong – health is important, but a number on a scale? Not so much). Don’t be afraid to turn your focus on to something else, and even inward at times.

It took time to learn and accept that my journey is and will always be different from the next woman’s. Reading blogs, following those you don’t personally know on social media- these can all be points of inspiration, but they can also be points of comparison. It’s so important to know that what you see is only a carefully thought out version of the story. That’s why it’s become more and more important to me to be authentic – so that people get a genuine look at how I experience motherhood, my work, my home and LIFE! Life is beautiful as is, and if we’re too caught up in the physical parts of it, we can lose sight of the real focus – our loving relationships, our mental health and our happiness and fulfillment as mothers.

No matter what stage of pregnancy or motherhood you are at, I challenge you to give yourself a few words of encouragement each and every day!

What are your feelings on this postpartum journey? Do you have any words of encouragement for other readers?

Xx,
Tamera

Find Me on MomMe!

Tamera & Ariah at Disney

Do any of you mommas read Mom.Me? They’re a fabulous resource for all things pregnancy, parenting and lifestyle. All this month I’m a guest editor on their site! I’ll be sharing a few articles on the topics of happiness, motivation and the biggest reason moms should support other moms, no matter what. This first post is a letter to my younger self with everything I wish I’d known when I was first pregnant with Aden. Click here to read.

Hope you’ll check it out… Stay tuned each week in April for more!

Xx,
Tamera

Ways to Show Your Girlfriends Some Love

Our best friends are there for us no matter what comes our way in life and there is truly NOTHING like being able to call up your girls when you’re in need. Lately I’ve been reminded of this more than ever – no matter the circumstance, my girlfriends have my back. Maintaining and strengthening these relationships are so important, which is why I wanted to share some ways to show your best friends how much you love them today and everyday. 

how-to-show-gratitude

Thank You Notes

Thank you notes – not texts or Facebook messages – aren’t exactly the norm anymore. This makes it all the more special. Keep a stash of note cards on cute stationery for those little moments where you really feel the need to tell your best friend thanks. Whether you just had a really good talk or a crazy experience that reminded you why you are two peas in a pod, this small gesture goes a long way! Here are a few of my faves:

Girls Night Out or In

You don’t have to get your girlfriends material gifts to show them how much you love them. Planning a night out (or in) is a great way to send that reminder… What’s better to say how much you like hanging out together than actually all hanging out together? Plus when it’s all planned out, nobody will stress over conflicting schedules or finding the time. Come Friday, you’ll all be SO happy you took the time to get together!

Send Flowers

I think we can all agree that it’s one of the nicest surprises to receive flowers unexpectedly. Even a $5 bouquet from Trader Joe’s has the sweetest sentiment behind it and will serve as a reminder to that person all week long. Flowers always brighten my day and it feels just as good to pass that feeling on to someone else. It’s also a good time to support your local small businesses, whether it’s your neighborhood grocer or that flower shop that always smells so good when you walk by.

Be the Last One There

True friends are the ones that are there not only through the good and bad, but the downright boring! Whether it’s helping your friend move, offering to watch her dog while she’s on vacay, or running errands with her just for support, these seemingly monotonous activities show that you want to do something nice for them just because. This attitude goes both ways – you never know when you’ll need her to help you with some not so exciting things, but you know she’ll have your back, even when no one else seems to be able to commit.

Tamera-Friends-Kisses

I seriously love these girls! Couldn’t be more blessed.

Now it’s your turn! Let me know what you do to show your best friends love.

Xx,
Tamera

8 Motivational Affirmations

You don’t need to take a class or cite a study to know that positive thinking is a powerful tool. Harboring negative emotions, even unconsciously, can affect your mental health and influence your actions. It’s even more difficult living in a world that’s frequently focused on comparison and judgment. Because so many of our feelings toward something are manifested subconsciously, it’s difficult to do a mental 180 when it comes to thoughts on a situation, no matter how you try!

An affirmation can be a great way to tackle a nagging negative feeling and transform it into something that you benefit and grow from. Simply by reading inspiring words, I feel a sense of peace and confidence. Like a friend that gives you all the right advice just when you need it, affirmations can provide the positive reinforcement we need when no one’s around.

Success Maya AngelouI’ve rounded up 8 motivational affirmations that reinforce positive thinking and self-love.. because we could all use a little more of both :)

1. I possess the qualities need to be extremely successful.

2. My ability to conquer my challenges is limitless; my potential to succeed is infinite.

3.Affirmation 1

4. I trust myself. (Seems so simple but is usually needed most when making difficult decisions!)

5. I kindly ask for help and guidance if I cannot see a better way.

6. Everything that is happening now is happening for the ultimate good.

7.Affirmation 2

8. I press on because I believe in my path.

When you’re feeling unmotivated or unconfident, repeat these affirmations to change your perspective.

What’s your inspiring thought for the day? Please share!

Xx,
Tamera

Quote sources: Prolific Living, Success Consciousness, The Huffington Post

The Benefits of Taking Time Off

The Benefits of Taking Time Off

The busier life gets, the more time seems to pass us by. We each work harder, spread ourselves thinner and focus on our own needs less and less. When career ambition and the daily grind consume our lives, it can put us in a state of unrest. That doesn’t mean that you don’t love every second of life as a partner, parent and employee, but it does mean that when you lose yourself, you can be robbed of your passion for life and feel misguided in your pursuits. That is why taking time off is one of the best things you can do for yourself (and really, those around you).

I greatly enjoy time off between projects. Steady work is always welcome, but by taking time off I allow myself to focus on what inspires me –time off replenishes my soul and makes me a better, happier wife, mother and actress at the end of the day. It also offers a great deal of other benefits. 

The Benefits of Taking Time Off

Taking time off can dramatically reduce stress, the risk of heart disease, memory loss, and can actually help our bodies to heal faster. It’s also a perfect way to connect with our families in a fun and relaxed environment, or work on our own identities through me time. I cherish every day off I have with Aden because we can play together without the pressure of schedules. But a little me time also helps my happiness level and sanity. Time off can actually help you prosper as well. It’s during downtime that some of the greatest ideas arise. Stepping away from work for even 24 hours can restore your drive to tackle projects with new vigor and creative energy. When productivity and happiness are high, career advancement is more likely to take place.  

So what’s the next step when you decide you need a break? Here are a few tips for making the experience fruitful.

Tip 1: Saving Money

Taking time off doesn’t need to be a financial strain on your family –extravagant trips or months off aren’t necessary for finding yourself. No matter how much money you make it always pays to be financially responsible and set aside money for vacations, breaks or little personal treats. Before taking time off, decide to start putting a small percentage of your income aside. Once you’ve accumulated a nice nest egg – an amount that won’t deplete your savings or alter your family’s lifestyle –then plan your vacation.

Tip 2: Manage Vacation Days

Over 40% of Americans do not use all their vacation days. We’re one of the few countries that don’t take enough time off. Working constantly might seem like the best move, both financially and for your career, but vacations and even sabbaticals exist for a reason: they make you a better you. Make the most of the hard work you’ve already put in by keeping track of how much time off you’ve accumulated and use it before your days expire.

Tip 3: Create a Schedule

Taking time off doesn’t always mean having nothing to do. This is the time to explore your passions and recenter your energy. Decide what you want to do with your time in advance, whether a creative endeavor or an excursion, and make an actual schedule of tasks. While short breaks can involve just catching up on missed sleep and treating yourself to a pedicure, longer breaks will be most beneficial for the soul – with a little structure. 

Tip 4: Attend a Retreat

If creating your own schedule isn’t right for you, or you don’t have more than a few days to steps away from the daily grind, look into attending a retreat. There are meditation and faith-based retreats that will give you the serenity to nourish the health of your head and heart. Creative retreats that surround you with likeminded people looking to further personal and professional growth are available too. Being immersed in such settings for 24 hours a day will help you to abandon your worries and create a bonding opportunity between yourself and others just like you. 

Have you ever taken time off to replenish your soul? What steps did you take to get back to the best you? 

Xx,
Tamera